"...for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content." (Phillipians 4:11)
I love my morning drives to work. It's just me and God winding down those curvy roads...and reminders everywhere of His unfailing power and majesty. Lately, I have found myself becoming irritable about aspects of my job that I was not anticipating upon entrance into the real world--like the excessive amounts of paperwork and the high-stress environment.
Yesterday, as I was driving in to work, God used a cement truck to jog my memory of His faithfulness.
Yes, I did say "a cement truck".
Patience is a virtue that God wants to infuse in my very being, but stubborn me refuses to accept. I constantly find myself arguing with myself (wise folks do that, you know) about the necessity to pray for patience. I know I need more of it, but I'm afraid of the circumstances that will come to work patience in me. God brought that ridiculously slow cement truck into my morning routine yesterday to try my patience...and give me a shocking reminder of my critical spirit and other character flaws that need to be chiseled away. I rode behind that truck for 20 minutes, complaining in my heart and grumbling aloud. The truck was going about 15 miles under the speed limit and I was already running behind schedule. There were no passing zones in sight.
All of a sudden--I don't really recall how--I realized that the old cement truck was a gift from God to help me grow closer to Him by building my faith and my character. I had just been complaining and grumbling about a gift from my faithful, precious, Holy Father! What an ungrateful child I have been!
As tears began to flow and I poured out my broken, repentant heart before God--driving through the backroads of central Arkansas--my mind went back to my attitude at work. Sure, I love my patients and the work I do with them, but I just have not had such a loving and thankful spirit towards other areas of the job. I thought about how it's made me feel when I've given gifts to people only to have their faces darken in dissappointment with no "thank you" to follow.
And I thought about all the amazing things leading up to this job that revealed God's hand on every detail of it. My job is a gift from my Father. He has a purpose and a plan for me at this place, and I should daily praise Him for His kindness, love, grace, and tender mercy.
I am still learning to be content with where I am, who I am, and what I am doing. There's no room for complaint with a God-gift. They are always perfect and right on time. He is my provider, and I will trust in Him.
1 Timothy 6:6-8 "But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. And having food and raiment let us be therewith content."
