The cause still remains unknown.
I spent a few hours out at Central Arkansas Youth Camp today. Brushed a girl's eyebrows with a fork and tried to make a guy laugh by attempting to sell him rocks to stick up his nose to protect him from the mosquitoes. I even made a girl sniff a stick and tickled another with a leaf.
That's just how I do things when I'm a Bounty Hunter playing the game "Underground Railroad."
My job was to make folks laugh, so my random side went nuts. I practiced my terrible accent collection--from Cogney-English, to Irish, Spanish, and even some Middle-Eastern sounds thrown in there. It was fun, but sadly, even my best stuff only brought smiles to those faces. They were a tought crowd to break!
The place was teaming with sweaty, smelly kids--and adults--but no one seemed to mind. I fit right in. That's why I still don't know if my eyes were blurry because of sweat or tears. You see, though the music didn't move me [Amazing Grace has a lot more meaning to me than these fancy contemporary Christian songs], the message did. It always does. So I know there were some tears thrown in there with the salty concoction oozing from my pores. My tear ducts hated to be left out.
"A Different Kind of Love." That's this year's theme. That was tonight's message. I pray that it sinks in, grasps those troubled hearts, wraps around their very souls, and never lets them go. I pray it transforms them, changes their lives, breaks the bondage of the past, and opens doors to the future for these children and teens who've never known the unconditional love of Christ.
What a blessing it was. I will be there tomorrow night. And the next. Oh, and the next after that, too!
There is nothing to get your spirits down like rude people. Wednesday just hasn't started off fabulous. You know what, though...I haven't posted a multitude monday post in a while so today I should do that. As well as throw in some miscellany monday, too.
Even if it is a Wednesday. I think that would help me feel better.
Random:
* Still adjusting to having long nails. I haven't bit them, and they are still growing spendidly. Yay!
* Trying to get in the habit of straightening my hair every day. Apparently doing so makes me "look like a...a...a...model," according to some folks. I've never been told that before and I assume it's a compliment. :)
* I've lost eight pounds. I've gotta lose another 51 pounds to get to where I was in 2008. It's so easy to gain and so hard to lose!
* I graduate August 12th at 7:00pm. Sadly, I have not formally invited anyone to this graduation, as I've done in the past. I guess I'm just graduationed-out. I would love to have anyone come that would like, though! It's less than a month away! EEK!
* Speaking of graduation makes me think of jobs. I have been offered an incredible position in a mountain town 1 hour, 40 minutes from here, but I have a couple of possibilities much closer...one that has just, quite literally, fallen into my lap. I am kind of waiting this out and seeking the right choice. I am very hesitant to move.
* Best day all week: Tuesday. Heather. Me. Flea markets. Double Chocolaty-Chip Iced coffee-less frappacino at Starbucks. Razorback snowcone. Bookstores filled with the calming, euphoric fragrance of old, musty, well-read adventures waiting for a new pair of eyes to soak in their wonderful stories...oh, and not to mention a two-hour search for rental disney movies, frozen pizza and cheesesticks, and Reeses Pieces. "Me, Eloise." ...and two-tenths of Alladin (seen from Youtube with fuzzy quality. Part 3 was missing so we stopped there). I think that was the most fun I've packed into a day in a long time. I sure hope I didn't set her back on her work too much, though!
Thankful for:
111. Lasting friendships with the most unique group of individuals.
112. Poolside giggles and talks about "cholerics and steadies."
113. Realizing I have overcome my fear of deep water.
114. God's faithfulness. His hand of instruction, rod of discipline, and words of encouragement...at just the right moment.
115. Catch-and-chase games with Stella that have kind of become routine (like patty-cake with a toddler).
1. You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE".
2. You watched the Pound Puppies.
3. You can sing the rap to the "Fresh Prince of Bel Air"
4. You wore biker shorts under your skirts and felt stylish.
5. You yearned to be a member of the Baby-sitters club and tried to start a club of your own.
6. You owned those lil Strawberry Shortcake pals scented dolls.
7. You know that "WOAH" comes from Joey on Blossom.
8. Two words: M.C. Hammer
9. If you ever watched "Fraggle Rock".
10. You had plastic streamers on your handle bars.
11. You can sing the entire theme song to "Duck Tales ".
12. When it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.
13. You wore a ponytail on the side of your head.
14. You saw the original "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" on the big screen.
15. You were super-excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.
16. You made your mom buy one of those clips that would hold your shirt in a knot on the side.
17. You played the game "MASH" (Mansion, Apartment, Shelter,House)
18. You wore Jordache jean jacket and you were proud of it.
19.
20. You wanted to change your name to "JEM" in Kindergarten.
21. You remember reading "Tales of a fourth grade nothing" and all the Ramona books that Ramona completed in 1st grade.
22. You know the profound meaning of "
23. You wanted to be a Goonie.
24. You ever wore fluorescent clothing.
25. You can remember what Michael Jackson looked like before his nose felloff...
26. You have ever pondered why Smurfette was the only female smurf.
27. You took Lunch Pails ! to school.
28. You remember the CRAZE, then the BANNING of slap bracelets.
29. You still get the urge to say NOT after every sentence.
30. You remember Hypercolor t-shirts.
31. Barbie and the Rockers was your favorite band.
32. You thought Sheera and He-Man should hook up.
33. You thought your childhood friends would never leave because you exchanged friendship bracelets.
34. You ever owned a pair of Jelly-Shoes.
35. After you saw Pee-Wee's Big Adventure you kept saying "I know you are, but what am I?"
36. You remember "I've fallen and I can't get up"
37. You remember going to the skating rink before there were in-line skates.
38. You ever got seriously injured on a Slip and Slide.
39. You have ever played with a Skip-It.
40. You had or attended a birthday party at McDonalds.
41. You've gone through this nodding your head in agreement.
42. Guns 'N Roses
43. "Don't worry, be happy"
44. You wore like, EIGHT pairs of socks over tights with high top Reeboks.
45. You wore socks scrunched down.
46. Red Rover at recess
47. You remember boom boxes vs. cd players.
48. You remember watching both "Gremlins" movies.
49. You know what it meant to say "Care Bear Stare!!"
50. You remember watching Rainbow Bright and My Little Pony Tales
51. You thought Doogie Howser was hot.
52. You remember Alf, the lil furry brown alien from Melmac.
53. You remember New Kids on the Block when they were cool.
54. You knew all the characters names and their life stories on "Saved By the Bell", the ORIGINAL class.
55. You know all the words to Bon Jovi - SHOT THRU THE HEART.
56. JAMS were SO in style
57. Come on Eileen!!!!!!!!
58.
59. Really bad hair..........
(I don't remember ALL of these, but I CAN nod my head to most of them...lol!)
I sure wonder what the next few months hold. I try to focus on the here-and-now, but sometimes I just can't help but think about it. I feel like I'm speeding down a road with a blindfold on, knowing there's going to be a sharp turn or drop off somewhere up ahead, but I'm not sure where it is and I cannot see where I'm going in order to avoid it. That's the anxiety side of me kicking in, I think.
A friend told me the other day that I was going interview-happy because I've had one nearly every week since May. Yeah, I guess I am, but I'm doing it because I'm clueless about what's going to happen come August 15th, and I don't want to leave any doors unclosed.
My preference is to stay around here and find a job working with anyone from 0-115 years of age.
I just don't want to leave the people I've grown to love here! Then I feel guilty because I love my family very much, but I don't really want to move closer to where they are. My reasons aren't because I wouldn't like to have them nearby, but because the southern part of this state is just...lifeless and draining. I don't know how else to describe it. Drive through sometime and see for yourself. It's in the atmosphere or something.
I feel like a little, helpless girl right now--looking to Dad for answers but not understanding the reply. I sure hope His will would be revealed soon. Graduation is one month away.
I wonder what's going to happen after that...
I've had my toes stepped on quite a few times since I began to realize what legalism truly is and that my life revolved around it--not God. I've had my heart ripped out, put through the fire, and scrubbed but it still doesn't shine like gold. God is still tearing this chain away, after all this time. Of course it wouldn't take so long if I would just let Him have it, but sometimes it's so hard to just let go and believe. It's like I think doing things the "right way" will make me "more saved." Completely unbiblical concept, I know!
Today, I was extremely blessed by a xanga blog I've been following for a few years. She often blesses me with what she's learned through her experiences, but today's hits at a spot in me I feel like sharing with my friends. Today, like many other times in the past, she talks about legalism. I love how Resolved2Worship writes about topics. She makes you think. She points it back to Christ. Like everyone else, she's imperfect, but she shares how God is working in her life through her imperfections. And how He is working some of those imperfections out of her, smoothing the sand grain into a pearl.
If you struggle with legalism, stop turning to your self and turn to God. I don't have all the answers; I'm still learning. God, however, knows all the answers and will reveal them to you when you seek Him. If you are on this same path I have found myself, I recommend checking out Mrs. Alyssa's xanga for encouragement and thought-provoking questions. Her blog sends me to my bible with burning questions and a desire to draw closer to Jesus.
I like that. I like that in the materials I read and in the relationships I form in my day-to-day life.
Does it point me back to the One worthy of all glory, honor, and praise? That's another rabbit trail for another day, though.
...I have no photos to show for it!
I took my camera, but didn't get any snapshots. I'm sorry!
The past week has been extremely fun--and energy-zapping--all wrapped in one package. Swimming, board games, quality time, laughter, pranks, good food, bonding, reunions, watching videos, being in charge (of classes), planning surprises, trips alone to nowhere for no purpose, daydreaming, book-reading, job interviews, clothes shopping, grocery shopping, free stuff...the list goes on.
One really neat thing that's happened recently is: I haven't bitten my fingernails in two weeks! (My grandma would be proud of me as long as I didn't tell her how I've managed to keep away from my old habit). I've discovered that painting my nails in a COLOR keeps me from biting them. I used to paint them clear, but I'd bite off the polish out of habit. When you bite off colored polish, it leaves the nail looking very ugly. It kind of serves as a visual to me which has proven constant and effective.
I cannot tell you how excited I am about this!
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